PRACTICAL TIPS AND HELPFUL HINTS
2. Discussing Religion, Philosophy,
Politics etc.
“It is important not to put
an inmate off by what you discuss. The prisoner
will probably feel “I’d rather you walked beside
me than showed me the way”. As in all friendships,
the relationship will not benefit from the imposition
by one party on the other of ideas or creed which
the other may not welcome. The inmate, in a sense,
is your captive. Do not take advantage of this by,
for example, evangelising or making him talk about
a subject which he feels uneasy. This can happen
particularly easily in the area of religion, and
to a lesser extent, politics. A spell in prison
is a time of crisis, when emotions are in a kind
of melting pot and subject to unusual stress, so
a prisoner may well be more malleable and open to
influence than at other times. We have to be careful
not to misuse our position: a constructive approach
is to try to help him build up his own ideas. Reinforce
his self respect when this is low, gently showing
him that he is worth something at a time when he
probably feels that life has lost much of its value.” (NAPV)
This is not to say that religion
should not be discussed. For some, this is what they
want and need more than anything. Like everyone they
have a spiritual hunger and are often searching for
truth and the meaning of life. If they are happy about
your sharing with them your beliefs, knowledge and understanding,
then it is absolutely right to do so. Sensitivity is
what is required so that you do not force down his throat
something that he does not want yet, but may be too
polite to reject.
The Prisoners’ Friends’ Association
is a non-religious organisation. This does not exclude
religion, far from it, but it does mean that we are
meant to be-friend to those of any religion or of none.
The criterion is that they are someone or anyone in
need of friendship.
It is also worth remembering that
the prisoner’s values and priorities may be completely
different from your own. This may be due to his different
upbringing and circumstances. Again, non-judgmental
understanding is what is required, though you can help
him to re-evaluate what is important by helping him
to consider other options.
Your Attendance At Court Hearings
Should your friend have to go to
court he may be very grateful indeed to have your presence
there. It can be a very frightening and worrying experience
and a lonely one too. A surprising number of prisoners
are really touched when their visitor takes the trouble
to pop in to be with them and give them some moral support
and share the experience with them.
Occasionally the prisoner may prefer
for you not to be there. In which case, we should respect
their wishes.
Letter Writing
It has been said that a letter is
more important than a visit. We would encourage you
to write regularly if you can. Send postcards and Birthday,
Christmas, Chinese New Year cards if possible: they
are always appreciated far more than the effort required
to send them. More details on letter writing are in
Section 4 – Pen Friends.
Encouraging The Prisoner To Study
We would suggest that you encourage
the prisoner to use his time as usefully as possible.
It can be a good opportunity for them to study and this
can be arranged with the help of the CSD.
Some courses are available and others
can be arranged by correspondence.
Reimbursement Of Travelling Expenses
You are encouraged to apply for
the reimbursement of your travelling expenses. Please
see Section 7. |